Ever since I posted my first picture with a six pack on Facebook in 2012 I've been asked about how I manage to keep myself going to the gym, holding the diet and how to develop that much-needed self-discipline.
The fact is when we try to change something in our lives we'll inevitably encounter MASSIVE resistance, not only from the environment but within our own mind as well.
I remember when I was dieting for the first time it seemed as if every cell in my body was determined to keep the things the way they were, doubts kick in, cravings, I felt as if I could drop out every moment.
It is not a surprise that most people do fail within a few weeks of their diet, and the majority of those who do get results quickly return to status quo right after the diet. Why is that?
Essentially everything you are now and everything you have now is a result of the choices you made so far in your life.
In this article, I've decided to reveal the exact mindset to which I personally attribute a bit part of my success and especially when it comes to understanding the motivation for my behavior.
Sure we can argue that there are other factors involved here but I feel that this one particular mindset shift helped me more than anything else.
This mindset alone gave me the power to make the right decisions under pressure when everything seemed like it was against me and ultimately those good decisions that I'm able to make on a daily basis compound to success later on.
Our primal brain doesn't know that abs are sexy and sure as hell doesn't like when you're tampering with survival (limiting the amount of food, having a low body fat %).
That same six-pack-hating mind is the one making the daily decisions that either break you or make you. In order to master this area of life, we need to make sure that those decisions lead us in the right direction.
Why More Knowledge Doesn't Mean More Results
Have you ever wondered which is the limiting factor to achieving the body and health you want?
It surely isn't knowledge, there are thousands of new blog posts on the topic coming out every day such as the one you're reading now. On top of that, there are thousands of hours of video content being uploaded on YouTube explaining pretty much everything in detail about health and nutrition.
Despite having so much good diet information available in the last few years, with all the technology and content at our fingertips the rate of success hasn't improved that much.
We can conclude that the answer to why most people fail is definitely not knowledge or technology, it's something more primal, the answer lies in the human nature.
And if we break it down further we'll realize that all comes down to emotional mastery, the ability to control those primal instincts that prevent us from changing.
Mastering Emotions – Failure vs Success Decision Making Process
The way we feel has a HUGE impact on our daily decisions.
This decision-making process can be simplified and broken down into 3 stages. The order in which we go through these stages determines what kind of person we will become. Let me quickly explain.
So what does this illustration mean?
Failure Mindset Thought Process:
Most people's decision-making process starts by them asking themselves “How am I feeling right now?”, then based on that feeling they calibrate actions.
Those “weak-minded actions” solidify an identity of weak discipline and this cycle runs on an ongoing basis.
A quick example how this plays out in real life:
- Feeling > “How do I feel right now?” – I'm feeling a bit down today. Maybe I should skip the gym and have a pizza, I did work pretty hard lately. And that pizza really looks tasty.
- Action > Let me just see what TV Show is on Netflix and order that pizza.
- Identity > Diet and gym is really hard to manage. I guess I'm just the type of person who loves to eat everything and enjoy life. A healthy lifestyle is not for me.
You can already see how this leads to massive failure.
Even in this quick example, it's clear that the inability to separate emotions from actions is what ultimately leads to building a failure-oriented mindset.
The truth is, your mind can be working against you. All your emotions want is for you to be comfortable, exert the least amount of energy and survive. That's pretty much it.
Success Mindset Thought Process:
It's actually quite simple, all we have to do is the exact opposite! 🙂
This means that we will start the process by defining our identity.
First, ask yourself “Who do I want to be?”, “What does that person look like?”, really think about this! Then define the core values of that best version of yourself.
After you defined the identity you will do the actions based on that identity instead of your current emotional state.
A quick example how this plays out in real life:
- Identity > “What would the person I'm aspiring to become do today?” – He/she would go to the gym and get some healthy food afterward.
- Action > Let me pack, go to the gym, have a great workout and a nice healthy meal after.
- Feeling >”How do I feel right now?” I feel great and full of energy. So glad I did that workout this morning and this diet makes me feel awesome.
Here you can see how it works out in our favor.
As Aristotle said “We are what we repeatedly do.”, this means that if your actions are based on the best version of yourself you will inevitably become that person. All you need to do is make this quick shift and adopt the “IAF” Mindset, where IAF stands for Identity > Actions > Feelings instead of what most people do which is Feelings > Actions > Identity.
Conclusion
Having the right mindset when it comes to making the decision is the key to success. As human beings, we have incredible potential for change and growth but in order to accomplish this first, we need to master our emotions.
One of the best ways to do this is to guide our actions by embracing the identity of the person we want to become and base our decisions on that.
After you adopt this way of thinking it will not only improve your nutritional discipline but you can apply the same principles in all areas of life.
-Mario
Resources:
Resilience: Hard-Won Wisdom for Living a Better Life by Eric Greitens
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